“After the birth of my son, I realized that I was not attracted to cis-men. It was hard to communicate that to my husband but gradually he understood & we separated. I’d also started working in HISC as an outreach person & I started meeting the LGBTIQ people. When I couldn’t cope with my work, my in-laws offered to take care of my son for a few months. They never returned him to me, & the longing to see him made me cry day & night.

Life went on & I came to terms with my sexuality. I also accepted my son’s absence as long as he was well cared for. I got serious in my work and reached out to as many trans people as possible to help them with the HIV prevention program. I even dated a few trans men but it never got serious. Things changed after I met Ogo. He added me on FB & we started texting. We became friends. He was sensitive & showed a lot of care for me. We were in contact for almost a year when he decided to take a vacation from his job in Kerala. I went to pick him up from P/ling. He stayed at my place in T/phu & as days passed, I got worried and persuaded him to go see his family once. He agreed. When he returned, I knew we had formed an irrevocable bond. He quitted his job & my friends at Pride Bhutan guided him for a new career. Things moved fast from there on. We came out as a couple on TV & at first his family was upset. Gradually, they gave us their blessings. Being with Ogo gave me the strength to go and bring my son home. My stepdad & I left for my in-laws’ place at Sarpang & found my son. It’s been 5 years & they told him that his mother was dead. They did try to stop me but I didn’t give in.

Coming from a broken family myself, I didn’t want my son to grow up with a step-parent but Ogo cared & loved him like he’d do to his own kid. At home, we had no gender roles & Ogo does most of the chores. He’s a great cook. When my son was small, he called Ogo his dad. But slowly he realized the differences, so he called him by his name. Sometimes I get jealous too when my son is closer to Ogo. Even my family side with him when we have our arguments.

To others, we are an unusual family. But inside our small universe, we are perfect for each other. Ogo & I will celebrate our 4th anniversary this August & if things go as planned, we are planning on getting married in a formal wedding on that special day.”

Humans of Thimphu with Pride Bhutan: “Celebrating Diversity” is celebrating the pride month with stories of LGBTIQ+ families.

#HumansofThimphu #HumanStories #pridemonth

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