TW: Self Harm.
“I was born in the old Trashiyangtse. During a time when there were no paper vouchers available. I was a topper in school, the cream of the family. Then we moved to Thimphu and life got hard very quickly. I spoke a different language and had gone to a very different school. My grades dropped massively at first. Through the years, they got better but the insecurity remained.

To grow out of that lingering insecurity, I had many practices. In class 6 I would stand in front of the mirror and while brushing my hair, I repeated the words, ‘You are beautiful.’ I did this every day. I did feel beautiful and confident after I did that. I think I’d successfully tricked my mind to feel the way I said I felt. As the years went by, I became a confident girl who performed well in school and talked with everyone.

It was in high school my insecurities came back again. I started comparing myself to the popular girls. Whenever anxiety became overwhelming, I took to self-harm. I was under the illusion that it made me feel alive. Nobody knew about it, not even my family and friends. I ruined my class 12 exams too. But on the second try, I did better, started letting go of the hatred inside me, and got a scholarship for college to study Liberal Arts.

I feel extremely sad and angry about the things I did in the past. All I had to do was accept my flaws to know that everything was going to be alright. Everything wasn’t all rainbows and sunshine. But I’m happy to say that I did live far enough to see a good life.”

#HumansofThimphu #Humans #SelfHarm

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